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We were engaged in Paris four years to the day that we first met. Here is how things unfolded.
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View from the Trocadéro at night.
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The Plan
The plan was simple. I would bring Erika to Paris under the pretense of a client meeting. We would stay in a cozy hotel amid the narrow winding streets of Paris’s bohemian 6th Arrondissement. On February 7th, we would dine at Le café de l'homme – a chic restaurant with stunning views located in the Trocadéro. After dinner, at ten minutes to eleven we would stroll out on the terrasse of the Palais de Chaillot - a huge patio overlooking the Eiffel Tower. The Eiffel Tower sparkles for 10 minutes with 20,000 diamond-like lights on the hour. A few minutes before the hour I would get on my knee with the tower behind me and ask Erika to marry me. I wanted to time things so that the lights would start to sparkle as she answered. That was the plan. In November I booked a hotel room at Saint Andres des Artes and a table for two at Le café de l'homme and waited.
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Our friends Elisa & Romain help from Rio
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The permission
I wanted to ask Erika’s mother’s permission before I popped the question. I enlisted the help of Erika’s good friends Elisa and Romain who live in Copacabana. Romain translated my words and Elisa contacted Erika’s mom, Donna Lu, to deliver the message. It was a tense couple of days while I waited for a reply. Donna Lu responded through Elisa and Romaine: "Dear Son, at the moment you arrived and we discovered each other, I liked you VERY MUCH. I bless your future wedding and hope you and Erika will live happy forever, because you love each other so. I'm deeply moved, happy and I give her to you in full trust ("eu confio a Erika à você")."
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It started innocently enough as a murder mystery hosted by Paul and Joanne.
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The Pre-Engagement
The day before New Years my brother Paul and his wife Joanne hosted a murder mystery dinner party at their house in New Hampshire. Most of my siblings were there dressed as characters from an Agatha Christie novel. Over dinner (and after several glasses of wine) a sister-in-law who shall remain nameless blurted out “So when are you guys getting married?”. Wanting to keep my Paris plan a surprise, I tried to change the subject and failed in spectacular fashion. Before I knew it the whole table was chanting “ASK HER, ASK HER, ASK HER…”. Looking for an exit strategy I said I didn’t have a ring. I hadn't finished the sentence before three diamond rings were flung across the table at me. There was no exit. Declaring it my pre-engagement I asked Erika to marry me. “You’re not on you’re knees!” she objected. I complied and asked again. “Stop laughing, look me in the eyes and say it like you mean it” she replied. I asked a third time and she said yes. We never solved the murder that evening but at least another mystery had been laid to rest.
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Leaving Tour d’Argent and Erika doesn't suspect a thing.
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The Day
We arrived in Paris late on the evening of February 6th. We checked into our hotel and went to Café St Michel for a late dinner. The next day I told Erika I had to work so she went off to some sight seeing. I did some last minute preparations. I called Le café de l'homme to confirm our dinner reservation. “I am soreee, but that is imposseeble“ the restaurant was closed due to a government function. What about the reservation I made months ago? “But monsieur Doofie, you were notified.” Evidently notified with an e-mail that my spam filter intercepted. This seriously altered my plans. I knew a romantic restaurant down the street called Lapérouse so I booked a private room there. What I did not know until I went to check on the table was that the private rooms were once frequented by wealthy Parisian men looking for a place to meet their mistresses in secrecy. The mirrors in these rooms still bear the scratches of women who wanted to ensure their gift diamonds were the real thing. Not the place to launch a marriage. I cancelled with an hour to go and had the concierge at Saint Andres des Artes book us at Tour d’Argent.
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The moment (reenacted a moment later)
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The moment
Dinner was great. We had duck number 1,053,544. But it was approaching 10:30 PM and I had to get to the Trocadéro to get my proposal plan back on track. The concierge had informed the maitre d' at Tour d’Argent of my plans. He had a cab waiting outside the restaurant at 10:35. We had a wonderful driver from Spain. I asked him to wait for us when we got to the Trocadéro. I told Erika I just wanted to check out the view for a moment. We got out of the car. I had the ring and a bottle of champagne in my bag. We walked out to the center of the terrasse of the Palais de Chaillot. It was a quiet evening. There were just a few people around. The view was surreal. I got down on one knee, presented the ring and asked “Will you marry me?”. Erika said yes! As she did the tower came alive with 20,000 sparkling lights. It was a moment neither one of us will forget. And to make sure, Erika asked a passing Parisian to snap this picture.
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Erika phones her mom with the news from Buddha Bar.
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The denouement
We went to the Buddha Bar to celebrate. More champagne and phone calls to Brazil and beyond to share the news. We closed the Buddha Bar and were leaving when we met two models in search of a party. Determined to help us celebrate our engagement, they brought us to an underground bar near the Arc de Triomphe. More champagne and dancing. We left around 4 AM. It began raining. True to form in Paris, it was impossible to get a cab to stop on the Champs-Élysées. Undeterred, we walked in the rain to the la Concorde where a sympathetic drive stopped for us. Back at the hotel we slept until noon then headed to the airport. I had to fly off to Zimbabwe for work. Erika headed back to Sweden.
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Our Spanish cab driver shard the moment and gave us his blessing
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We had plenty of help celebrating our engagement.
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Ring de Triomphe - the start of a wet walk home
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Where it all happened
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The rock
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